Sunday, October 7, 2012

Friendly Little Guide

As an individual we should know what and whom are suit to be involved with our lives. Well, as we can see most of the teenagers would like to have their own group that they think can help them to grow and to mature. To experience new things in life. For you what are the qualities of a group that you would want to belong with? To share moments and to learn with?  Aside from our family, friends are one of the most necessary people to our lives because when were  not at home, the people who are we can be together is our FRIENDS.

As I searched for an article that contains some guidelines on choosing people to be with, I came across in this site called Life Coaching containing an article made by Chris Wesley entitled Choose Your Friends Wisely - They Control Who You areThis article can teach us how to determine people and what are their role in our lives. It also involves us to learn more about ourselves  and how we can be able to socialize with the right people. It stated that friends can help us not only in terms of knowing our worth, but also they can help us to see what we can do. Friends help us to discover things we might never know just by ourselves. But then the most important part is for us to choose the right circle of friends to have and who are essential to our lives.

Chris cited some questions to help you think about how well-chosen your friends are:

1. Do you feel good about yourself with your friends? Friends sometimes have agendas which don't serve you very well. Do you feel disapproved of often? Good friends will tell you what you need to know if when you don't want to hear it, but some friends may have other reasons for showing you their disapproval. If that happens too often, your self esteem may suffer.

2. Do you feel good about your friends? It’s not unusual to spend time with people for reasons like convenience, lack of an alternative, feelings of obligation, habit, and so on. But do you like them? Do you think they are good people? If you had to start again and build a new set of friends, would they make it into the team?

3. Do your friends support your aspirations? Are all your mates are from your schooldays or from work or from your neighborhood or social class? Are they all of the same gender or outlook? If so, then they may act in very subtle ways to keep you consistent with their sense of identity.

4. Givers and takers. Does your friend leave you feeling better or worse? Good friendships are all about mutual support and growth, but some friends are big takers – they dump their problems on you, tell you what you can’t do, play on your fears and keep you where you are. You may want to limit how often you see these friends, and so limit their drain on your own energies. Instead, find friends where the balance is more even; where mutual support and growth is the norm.

In my opinion, and by experience I think friends are very important to every person’s life because they are the one who can give us the need of belongingness. People tend to be lonely at some point of their lives, but friends will always be there to guide us and can make us feel that we are not even lonely because they are the one who can always be there. But first thing we must consider is that people have their own differences.

As an important tip, we should choose people that can make an important role to our lives. People who can influence us to do good things that can make us better. People come and go, and we should never consider those people who would use us to get what they need in life. We should consider those people who will help us and will never leave us along the way and that people are those who we call “friends” 

In addition to the information that I have learned, there are some questions that I would like to discover for me to answer it. Here they are:

1. What are the benefit of choosing people to be with?

2. What are the cons and prons of having peer pressure?

3. Why we are friends to our friends?

In order for me to answer the above questions, I should read more information from articles, blogs that talks about Peer Pressure and anything else that can help me.